7 part series: Drop the Rules 3/7



7 part series: Drop the rules


Reach out to others 3/7




In this 7 part series, we are learning:


        The best gift you can give yourself – part 1

          How to turn silver into gold – part 2

        Just how important your voice is – part 3

        How you car is your lifeline

        Why hugging a tree is important

        The six letter word that changes everything

        What cooking teaches us about healing




Here’s to dropping the rules!





Today, it’s all about support. It’s about knowing you have support. It’s about the importance of being supported and heard. Lastly, it’s about understanding how unresolved grief can manifest.



There is nothing like a strong support system. When you are going through difficult times, it can be easy to retreat and think you need to figure it out on your own. Perhaps you feel there isn’t anyone who understands how you feel. Maybe you think that you’ll stuff your feelings and your pain will eventually go away or maybe that bucket of ice cream is looking pretty good right about now! Perhaps you believe you’ll get through it okay alone.  



I am here to tell you that there are others who understand what you are going through. I wrote an article about 5 key lessons learned about the power of a support system. I encourage you to refer to it as a supplement to this article.We all yearn to be heard. We all want to have a voice and need to feel we are understood. 



Here’s something else to think about. There are consequences of avoiding your pain. Here are some examples of how holding onto pain can manifest:



1.     A client of mine was unhappy in his life. He wasn’t where he thought he would be and felt stuck. He was borderline suicidal. His legs became very inflamed, infected and extremely irritated.  This was a metaphor for his inability to move forward in life. He felt stifled and it manifested outwardly. Once we worked through things and he felt he was able to move forward in life, the symptoms magically disappeared.


2.     Another client of mine had multiple ankle breaks in a short period of time. She had numerous health conditions and wavered whether she wanted to live or die. She ultimately worked through this and decided she wanted to stay… stay grounded with her feet firmly planted on the floor. Guess what? No more ankle accidents.


3.     I  (this body) was diagnosed with oral cancer. I’ve never smoked, never chewed tobacco, I’m not a drinker, outside of the occasional glass of wine, and here this body was with oral cancer. What!?! I was in a relationship where I didn’t feel my voice mattered. I could talk until I was blue in the face and nada. Here I was a coach; guiding others to live their highest and best life, and I was dealing with my own crisis and my emotions manifested through the physical body.


4.     I know quite a few people who get pneumonia after experiencing a loss. I learned that pneumonia can be common for people grieving. After witnessing so many people with pneumonia in these circumstances, (myself included) I understand the correlation.



If this describes you or someone you know, I encourage you to reach out to online and/or in person support/recovery groups available. Health Finder has a national list of various support groups available. Alternatively you can use professor Google to find the right group for you. 



If you prefer 1 on 1 support, I offer grief coaching and success coaching. I know, these are two interesting combinations, aren’t they?  I’ve been a coach and mentor for 25 years and I have integrated grief coaching to blend my experience and complement my family care giving experience.  If you’d like a free strategy session to see if this may be right for you, contact me here.




IT’S YOUR TURN: Have you or someone you know sought out support groups? Do you need support working through a particular issue in life? Please comment below with feedback on a particular group that helped you or someone you know! Your comment may help someone else.



If you missed any part of this series, click the above links to catch the rest.





                                        See below or click here for your FREE giftHarness your power within-3dcoverC


“Harness Your Power Within: Proven Tools to Transform Your Life TODAY”  




Dedicated to YOUR success,




Tandy Elisala Bio Pic

Tandy Elisala Bio Pic


Tandy Elisala, MA, CPSC, ACT, CHt, TFT-fAlg, is founder and CEO of Center for Inspiring Greatness.™  Tandy is a Care Giving Expert, Certified Professional Success Coach, Author and Consultant. She is certified in various alternative-healing modalities. Tandy has 25 years’ proven experience as a corporate executive, speaker and coach.  Tandy was a full-time caregiver for both parents simultaneously while kicking cancer’s butt a third time and raising three children as a single parent. Tandy lives in Phoenix, Arizona, with her three kids, two dogs, and three cats. Tandy’s book, Healing Through the Chaos: Practical Care-Giving is available for pre-order at http://www.tandyelisala.com



                                                    FREE GIFT:      


“Harness Your Power Within: Proven Tools to Transform Your Life TODAY”   



This 87 page workbook style eBook gives you a proven & simple path to overall well-being. Learn practical tools to bring positive results with self-care, health, wealth, business & relationships. Exclusive imagery & affirmation techniques & best practices are integrated to help you release, reassess and harness your power within!



© Copyright 2013, Tandy Elisala, http://www.centerforinspiringgreatness.com and http://www.tandyelisala.com. Permission is granted to copy, forward, or distribute this article for non-commercial use only, as long as this copyright byline and bio, in totality, is maintained in all duplications, copies, and link references.  For reprint permission for any commercial use, in any form of media, please contact Tandy at tandy@tandyelisala.com


Follow me

Tandy Elisala

Family Caregiver Coach, Cancer Empowerment Advocate and Chief Inspiration Officer at Center for Inspiring Greatness | Empowered Family Caregiver
Tandy Elisala is passionate about helping family caregivers go from being overwhelmed and stressed to empowered and calm. Tandy went through cancer four times and learned how to heal using conventional, complementary, and alternative therapy. Tandy left her corporate career to take care of both parents simultaneously while raising three kids as a single mom. She took care of both parents for 2 1/2 years until their respective deaths. Tandy now teaches what she learned on her journey. Tandy is a family caregiver coach, a multiple best-selling author, inspirational speaker and mom to three adult kids, one angel dog and one diva cat.

Join our Facebook community at http://www.facebook.com/groups/EmpoweredFamilyCaregiver

©Copyright 2003-Present All rights reserved
Follow me
2 replies

Leave a Reply

Want to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *