7 Self-Care Mistakes You Don’t Know You Are Making

7 Self-Care Mistakes You Don’t Know You Are Making

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Self-Care is a huge topic and there are countless tips on maintaining excellent self-care. This week, I am sharing 7 mistakes you don’t know you are making and tips to overcome them. Cheers to awesome self-care!

Mistake #7:  You believe everything (or almost) people tell you. Think about it. When people say negative things to you like, “I hate you” or “I don’t like you”, you believe them. There is no questioning their feelings, right? Alternatively, when people say positive things like, “I love you” or “You are beautiful”, you tend to question it and break it down every which way. Well, do they reallyyyy love me? Do they really think I’m beautiful or are they just saying that because (insert negative self-talk here)? We rarely question the bad but usually question the good. The same can apply to our health. When a doctor gives us a bad diagnosis, a lot of people accept this as ‘truth’ and don’t question it (as often as we probably should).  Accept the good as truth and care less what others think of you. Recognize you are perfect from the bottom to the top and inside out!

Mistake #6: You say ‘yes’ when you really want to say ‘no’. I’ve talked about this before  and discussed the importance of honoring yourself and only saying yes to that which serves you in some way; whether it accomplishes a goal, a bucket list item, being of service to others, or resonates with you.  Say “no” to something today! Only say ‘yes’ to things that are for your highest good in some way.

Mistake #5: You don’t ask for help. Everyone needs help sometimes! We put others first and do, do, do for everyone else, running around like chickens with our heads cut off until the last errand is done, homework is complete, dinner and dishes are done, etc… We deserve a strong support system. Let others do things for you! Ask someone to do something for you this week.

Mistake #4: You say to yourself, “I’ll go work out after dinner or after x,y,z.” Unless you have a regular practice of exercising after dinner, you are sabotaging yourself by going home, changing clothes and getting distracted by dinner, kids, facebook, email, work, whatever it is for you… You have every intention of working out but minutes turn into hours and then it’s too late and you have a missed  opportunity for exercising excellent self-care. Remember, “I regret going to the gym… said nobody ever. Stick with your exercise routine. Get an accountability partner. You are welcome.

Mistake #3: You watch TV for hours on end or spend time on social media like Facebook or Pinterest for hours on end…aimlessly doing nothing that really matters (in the big scheme of things). It happens to the best of us. Some strategies to help with this include scheduling time for these activities and setting timers. You could also find alternative things to spend time doing such as meditating, watching funny movies, spending time with family and friends, do a hobby, read a book, etc…

Mistake #2: You eat while watching TV. Research suggests that eating while watching TV encourages overeating. We overeat because we aren’t paying attention to our bodies as much as we are the show or movie you’re watching. We tend to eat faster, too.  It can also encourage emotional eating; depending on what you are watching. If possible, I recommend eating at a table away from TV; preferably with your family.

Mistake #1:  You watch crime, drama, or horror movies instead of funny or uplifting type shows or movies. Studies prove that humor heals. I like a good drama show (absolutely no horror movies allowed though) as much as the next person and it’s okay in moderation. The key is to incorporate more humor into your every day life! Watch more comedies. It’s great for your mind, body and spirit.

I hope these tips help you think about your habits and self-care. Remember that we are all responsible for the energy we bring into the world and the energy we put out into the world. Make it count and make it positive! Remember, it’s the little moments that make life big!

 

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 It’s your turn: Which of these mistakes resonate with you the most? What other mistakes would you add? Please comment below!

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Tandy Elisala

Family Caregiver Coach, Cancer Empowerment Advocate and Chief Inspiration Officer at Center for Inspiring Greatness | Empowered Family Caregiver
Tandy Elisala is passionate about helping family caregivers go from being overwhelmed and stressed to empowered and calm. Tandy went through cancer four times and learned how to heal using conventional, complementary, and alternative therapy. Tandy left her corporate career to take care of both parents simultaneously while raising three kids as a single mom. She took care of both parents for 2 1/2 years until their respective deaths. Tandy now teaches what she learned on her journey. Tandy is a family caregiver coach, a multiple best-selling author, inspirational speaker and mom to three adult kids, one angel dog and one diva cat.

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23 replies
  1. Brenda Adams
    Brenda Adams says:

    Mistake #6: You say ‘yes’ when you really want to say ‘no’ really resonated with me. Years ago in my Life Coach training one of our mentors ha told us that overtime we say yes to something we are saying no to something else. Sometimes it’s good and sometimes it’s not. So I try to keep that in mind when I am trying to decide what to say yes to. I ask myself, if I say yes to this, what will I have to say no to to create the time that will be needed.

    Reply
  2. Alicia Nicole Waters!
    Alicia Nicole Waters! says:

    Wonderful article and very much needed. I love the way you express yourself in your posts. Self care is vital and essential and not an extra. Thanks for providing the steps to take and also the paths to avoid that will cause us to make mistakes around our self care agenda.
    I will share this with others.

    Reply
  3. Heidi Alexandra
    Heidi Alexandra says:

    I’m with Jessica on this one for the #1 mistake – I cut out all television and crime and horror style shows – and I watch a brief selection of funny videos on You Tube each night – keeps my spirits high!

    Reply
  4. Maribel Jimenez
    Maribel Jimenez says:

    Yes, I can see where I’m making some of those mistakes…without realizing it…thanks for sharing! I know the first step to change is awareness and can see some shifts I can make right away! 🙂

    Reply
    • Tandy Elisala
      Tandy Elisala says:

      Thanks, Maribel! You are right on about awareness being the first step to change. So glad you found the article helpful.

      Reply
  5. Mitch Tublin
    Mitch Tublin says:

    These tips are perfect for anyone to follow.
    For me, I cannot imagine a day with out working out.
    So I go in the morning, early, if on the road traveling,
    same routine. It sets the tone for the day!

    Reply
  6. Mira Dessy, NE, The Ingredient Guru and author The Pantry Principle
    Mira Dessy, NE, The Ingredient Guru and author The Pantry Principle says:

    Fabulous tips Dr. Tandy! I love #1 and don’t like watching violent or uncomfortable television or movies. I think most of us don’t laugh enough and always enjoy the opportunity to laugh. I also believe that we respond hormonally to what we are exposed to. So the fear or nervousness of “danger” in visual media has an impact on us. Conversely humor has been shown to be healthy for us and so I can only believe that watching something that makes us laugh has a positive impact on our health.

    Reply
    • Tandy Elisala
      Tandy Elisala says:

      Thanks, Mira. I agree that all the negative images we see today really impact us on so many levels. It’s a great thing to only focus on that which lifts us up higher.

      Reply
  7. Jessica
    Jessica says:

    A few years ago, I cut out all of the crime or horror shows despite the industry accolades. My body doesn’t feel well after watching something scary or upsetting. Give me comedy and romance any day!!! My one exception is 24.. don’t know why, it doesn’t stress me out. Maybe because I know Jack Bauer is the man!

    Reply
    • Tandy Elisala
      Tandy Elisala says:

      That’s awesome, Jessica! I stopped watching the news years ago too and it has made a huge difference for me. My body tensing up before bed is not the goal!! Although I’ve never seen 24, my sister and son really love that show. I agree that Jack Bauer is the man!

      Reply
  8. Mary Ellen Miller
    Mary Ellen Miller says:

    Excellent tips Dr. Tandy. I particularly relate to not asking for help. Asking for help and delegation is one of my 2015 goals. It’s already working and helping me to be less stressed; therefore I am able to spend time doing the things I’m really good at!

    Reply
    • Tandy Elisala
      Tandy Elisala says:

      I can relate, Mary Ellen. Asking for help is something I’ve been working on myself. I think it’s a great goal for 2015; both asking for help and delegation!

      Reply

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