20 Consequences of Being Out of Integrity
I’m sure we’ve all been there at some point in life. Where is “there?” THERE is saying or doing something that is out of integrity with who you are, what you stand for, or what you believe. We are all human after all! If we were ‘perfect’, we wouldn’t be human.
Examples from my own life
I know I’ve been out of integrity a time or two…or 10 in my life! Here are some ways I’ve been out of integrity in my own life:
- Not doing what I said I was going to do. For example, I hired a health coach and agreed to certain things and wasn’t consistent.
- Not fulfilling my obligations.
- Saying YES to things I wanted to say NO to. Subsequently, I didn’t always DO the things I said YES to.
- Stopping just short of a goal.
- When I was 11, I literally busted in an apartment front door of someone who was talking poorly about my mom. Who knew I was so strong!?!
- Telling myself I would stop eating sugar and then proceeding to eat sugar!
- Not being honest with my “wasband” about my true feelings.
- Allowing my “wasband” to hurt us.
- Rolling through a stop sign.
- Taking words of someone I looked up to as my own.
In the case of #10, if I wanted to use her words, I should have asked for her permission and referenced her accordingly. I apologized to her and she accepted my apology. We don’t always have an opportunity to apologize or make things right when we’ve made a wrong decision.Trust can take awhile to build and can be broken in an instant. Click To Tweet
20 consequences of being out of integrity with yourself
When we are out of integrity with ourselves, above and beyond hurting the person we wronged, we hurt ourselves! This hurt can show up in the following ways:
- We bargain with ourselves.
- We lose other people’s trust.
- We don’t trust ourselves.
- We feel like a failure.
- We experience energy shifts.
- We attract the wrong people and situations.
- We play small.
- We are exhausted… in more ways than one.
- We can get sad or depressed.
- Excuses become the ‘norm’.
- We don’t truly love ourselves.
- We allow fear to drive us.
- We lack self-confidence.
- We lack self-compassion.
- We can experience a weakened immune system.
- We experience a lack of abundance.
- We shop, eat emotionally or (insert other addictive behavior here).
- We set a poor example for our loved ones.
- We aren’t leading by example.
- We aren’t emotionally available for others.
One of the biggest challenges of leading from within
The toughest person to lead is ourselves! There are many reasons for this. One reason is we see everything we do through the lens of our intention. We see what OTHERS do through their actual actions and don’t really think about their intention for said actions. We can convince ourselves all day long that what we did wasn’t ‘that bad’ because we didn’t ‘intend to do harm.’The toughest person to lead is ourselves! Click To Tweet
When we say or do things that hurt others, we risk the above consequences (and then some) and our relationship with others. Trust can take awhile to build and can be broken in an instant. In some cases, the damage is too much and trust can’t be rebuilt.
Remember, people are always watching what we say and do. We must be mindful to protect our integrity.Your capacity to lead expands through trust. Click To Tweet
Four foundations of trust
There are four foundations of trust. They include:
ALL FOUR must be present to truly embody trust. Remember, people are always watching what we say and do. We must be mindful to protect one of our most valuable assets… our trustworthiness.
It’s your turn: Have you ever said or done something that was out of integrity with your beliefs and/or values? What consequences did you experience? How do you ensure your behaviors are in alignment with your values? Please comment below!
Tandy lives in Tempe, Arizona, with her three kids and amazing angel dog. Order Tandy'sbooks at http://www.tandyelisala.com or www.amazon.com.
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